


"To love at all is to be vulnerable"

by WeAreCylons



Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-03-16
Packaged: 2018-09-17 21:53:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9348077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeAreCylons/pseuds/WeAreCylons
Summary: New Caprica. Laura finishes work at school on a Friday afternoon and muses on times gone by and on what could lie ahead of her. Not only regarding her own future, but also this thing between her and Bill for which she cannot find a name for yet.(Title from C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves")





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

Disclaimer: BSG (2003) and all the characters are property of Ron D. Moore. I merely borrowed his playthings to play a bit in his sandbox.

Enjoy! 

Jules xx

* * *

 

Straightening her back with a moan, she looked around the now empty classroom. She sighed and sat down on one of the small tables, massaging her temples with stiff fingers. Her students had left the tent in a chaotic state that would require at least thirty more minutes to get under control until she could finally start her very much needed weekend. Crumpled-up pieces of paper, pencils, books, leftovers from packed lunches and even toys were spread on the dusty floor in front of her. All she wanted to do, however, was head home and crawl into her bed. No, she corrected herself, head to her drafty tent and carefully settle on her creaky cot, wrapped in a blanket to keep out the cold that permeated everything on this planet at this time of year.

Laura closed her eyes for a moment and conjured the mental images she had secluded herself with countless times during those past few months. Pictures that made her forget the sorrows, doubts and bitterness that had been her daily companions for too long already. She saw herself standing in the sun, enjoying the warmth and the clear air. Luxuries they all had probably forgotten soon after, but nevertheless, these memories were more than clear in front of her eyes. Particularly because she was able to share them with another person.

A soft smile appeared on her face when she thought of how happy Bill had looked that day, how he had shamelessly ogled her, especially her cleavage, and had made it more than plain where he was standing concerning their relationship, be it professional or personal. She could still feel his breath on her face and his warm body shielding her from the cold night on New Caprica, his arm wrapped around her waist and his beating heart reminding her of how precious it was to be alive.

The time were they had been on opposing sides had long been over and after she had lost the election to Baltar, he had been the one making sure she didn't lock herself up in her grief and despair. Yet, it had cost him a lot of effort to relentlessly invite her to join him in his quarters for dinner or to continue their conversations about literature they both loved – despite all the conflicts and difficulties he now had to face with Baltar and parts of the fleet who had gone into open protest against their new president.

Laura had felt a sting, sitting on the couch next to Bill who had told her about these issues with a worried look on his face. When they had locked gazes back then, she had known that things would never be the way they had been before. That she would miss their briefings, them fighting for the survival of the human race together, even their arguments that had occurred because they were both incredibly stubborn and at times opinionated. But the bond that had been created between them had become stronger and stronger and it had nearly broken her heart when she eventually had decided to settle on New Caprica and get involved in founding the new school there.

Their goodbye in his quarters had been rather short and wordless, but when she extricated herself from their hug and Bill gently placed a hand on her cheek, she had struggled to fight back the tears stinging in her eyes. And it had been an emotional roller-coaster after that, of course. They had promised to visit each other as often as their responsibilities would allow – visits between the former president and the military leader did still seem rather innocuous – but letting people get close to her just to say goodbye again soon had never been one of her fortes.

From those few times of their mutual visits, though, she had gathered some other beautiful memories that she would dive into when she tried to escape the harsh reality on “the frakking rock” as most of the population had started calling New Caprica shortly after the bad weather had set in and ruined their crops. Laura loved reliving the moments with Bill where she had felt like she could really be in the present moment, not think about the days lying behind or ahead of them and simply live. When blue eyes met green, they reestablished a connection that gave them both a sense of strength and a feeling of familiarity that, and Laura could only speak for herself here, she had not felt in a painfully long time.

Nevertheless, she was guarded in her reactions and interpretations of what was developing between them. The Gods only knew what her life as a teacher here would bring her next, and Bill's future was equally uncertain. The last time he'd been on the planet, after they had enjoyed a long walk in the mountains, he had mentioned the possibility of him settling down there as well. But Laura's reaction had been so unobtrusive that he'd quickly dropped the topic and wrapped his hands around his hot cup of tea again, staring at the steaming beverage.

Now, when Laura thought back to this last visit, she felt like an idiot for pushing him away like this again. The rational part of her said it was the best thing to do, but the emotional part increasingly felt the loneliness penetrating every aspect of her life down here and she truly missed someone who would understand her. She didn't know what exactly there was to understand, but she craved the emotional and physical closeness with another human being – despite being surrounded by people all day, from her students to their parents to other volunteers who worked in the school or some other known faces from Galactica. Still, it wasn't the same and she, as much as she struggled against it, really missed Bill.

A creaking noise woke her from her musings and Laura realised that the table she was sitting on was less stable than she had thought. She got up swiftly and, after taking a deep breath, continued to tidy up and started to dump the paper and food in a rusty bin. When she bowed down next to one of the tables in the front row some time later, she suddenly heard footsteps approaching her, coming to a halt one or two rows behind her. Laura frowned and was ready to chide yet another child that had forgotten the books they needed to do their homework, but when she turned around, she froze.

Leaning against one of the tiny tables was the man she had just thought about moments ago, looking at her with an unreadable expression on his face. He was dressed in dark jeans, black boots and a thick navy wool sweater, and Laura tried to keep herself from staring at him because she had never seen him in civilian clothes before and, well, because his visit was more than unexpected. There was nothing else she could do apart from looking him up and down, however, since her voice had decided to be equally as stunned as her mind and she felt glued to the ground beneath her. After a few moments of mutual staring, Bill slowly continued his way towards her and stopped when they were only mere inches apart. A tender smile appeared on his face and he took one of her cold hands in his, gently stroking the back of it with his thumb. Laura let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding and pressed her lips together, trying to remain calmer on the outside than she actually felt, still looking him in the eye. Quietly, Bill finally broke the laden silence between them. “It's good to see you, Laura.” Laura squeezed his hand back and then a smile appeared on her face that displayed a whole range of emotions that were going through her. “You too, Bill.”

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Caprica. Laura finishes work at school on a Friday afternoon and muses on times gone by and on what could lie ahead of her. Not only regarding her own future, but also this thing between her and Bill for which she cannot find a name for yet.
> 
> (Title from C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves")

* * *

Disclaimer: BSG (2003) and all the characters are property of Ron D. Moore. I merely borrowed his playthings to play a bit in his sandbox.

Enjoy! 

Jules xx

* * *

Time was a human construct. She could have been standing there for a whole hour or only a couple of seconds, she really had no idea. The only thing she was aware of was the slightly calloused skin of his hand under hers, the blue of his eyes boring into hers, his bulk close to her own body radiating a heat she was constantly craving, his mere presence a soothing source of comfort and hope. Yes, hope that there was more to life than the one she was currently living.

Suddenly, she jumped and nearly lost her balance when a voice grumbled at them from the nearby side entrance of the tent. “Godsdammit, Bill, if you feel like you have to come planet-side unannounced, why do I have to hear about it from frakking Starbuck who just came to me, boasting that she got some fine stuff to drink from you, holding that bottle in my damn face?“ Bill, who had also jumped away from Laura when he'd heard his oldest friend's voice cursing at him, chuckled. “Saul, come on, you'd really think I'd only get something for her? Frakking idiot!“ With that, he shuffled over and slapped Saul Tigh playfully on the chest, then wrapped him in a short, but tight embrace. The other man was still glaring at him, but after a few seconds, his mouth started twitching and he presented Bill with one of his signature lopsided grins. “Well, you better come over to my place later then. Ellen's mood's been killing me for days, nah, weeks now, I guess she won't mind a nice glass of whatever you've brought.“

Laura, who had kept quiet during the exchange of words, had to suppress a giggle when she thought of how many times she had met the Tighs lately, unable to stop quarrelling over insignificant stuff in public. They had always presented an amusing distraction from her rather foreseeable daily schedule. Not that she minded working in her old profession again, not at all. She actually did love it. But rather often she, and it was something she would never admit in front of anyone, actually did miss the hustle and bustle of her job as president, the hard decisions she had to make on an almost daily basis, and yes, the arguments with a certain Admiral who was now bidding his friend goodbye.

After Saul had left the tent, making Bill promise he'd drop by before he'd leave for Galactica again, he turned around to face Laura and mumbled with a shrug and a lopsided grin that could very well compete with that of his friend: “So much for keeping my visit here as quiet as possible...” Laura covered the small distance between them in two strides and asked him with a twinkle in her eye: “And why would you not want people to know that you're here, Admiral?” Sensing that she was in a more playful mood than last time, Bill wiggled his eyebrows and then stated with a more serene expression: “Hm, I guess because I'd hoped I'd have plans here at least for the rest of the day and didn't want to fill my schedule with too much stuff?”

Laura had to stop herself from taking a deep breath again and from chickening out and just leaving him standing there. She knew what this was about and one half of her was absolutely cheering for her to just go with the flow and live again for once. The other half put its claws into her heart that was reaching out to him in order to stop her from making the mistake of getting involved again. Of course, Bill sensed her sudden change of mood and carefully, he laid one hand on her shoulder and gently nudged her chin up with the other to force her to look at him.

Once again, he detected a hint of the vulnerable side of Laura – not the cool, presidential mask of Miss Roslin – in her eyes that were connecting with his with a slightly sad expression. He whispered to her, kneading her shoulders gently. “Hey. I'm not going anywhere.” When she neither moved towards him nor turned away, he took a chance and leaned closer, their foreheads connecting. He could, beneath all those layers of warm wool clothes, smell her sweet scent, a mixture of sandalwood and other spices, and he presumed she'd been praying and reading the scriptures again before class. Bill pushed an errant strand of hair out of her face and softly stroked her cheek with an index finger. Still, Laura had not moved one bit and was standing rather stiffly in front of him as if she was frozen to the ground, unsure of what to do and what to think of the situation they were in.

And it wasn't like they hadn't had this kind of situation before. They had known each other for some time now, but New Caprica had given their relationship a new angle from which to look at it. Bill was more than ready to give in, let his heart win over his mind and simply allow things to unfold. But he was also aware that they had parted without moving forward in this direction the last time he had visited her. Even if a voice inside of him told him to push further and show her that he was sure of what he was doing, he was equally scared that she would distance herself from him if she wasn't ready and he was not prepared to lose her as the good friend she had been to him for so long already.

A hand caressing his cheek stopped him from diving into his thoughts any deeper and when he focused his eyes on her again, he saw that Laura was now watching him with a very open and gentle expression in her eyes while her fingers tenderly stroked the rough skin on his face. With a quiet voice, she addressed him: “Let's go home, Bill,” and with a sigh, she quickly added, “well, you know, to my tent.” Taking his hand in hers, she moved toward her desk, grabbed her coat and stuffed her books, her pencil case and what was left of her school lunch – she had not been really hungry again – into her two bags. Bill helped her into her coat and, although she protested, carried her bags for her. They let go of each others' hands before leaving the privacy of the tent, but walked close to each other nevertheless.

Of course, Bill caught the attention of several of the colonists who wanted to take the chance and talk to him, not neglecting to throw curious glances at the bags in his hands and the woman walking beside him once again, so it took a while until they arrived at the rather small tent Laura had been living in since she had moved down here. Laura opened the tent flap for Bill and followed him into the small space where it was only slightly warmer than outside. She immediately moved over to the fireplace that had probably stopped giving off heat hours ago and chucked some twigs inside to get the fire started, followed by a couple of bigger logs.

Meanwhile, Bill cast off his coat, placed Laura's bags next to the small wooden table at the rear end of her tent and was looking around the place. “You've got a new chair,” he noted. Laura, still kneeling on the floor, busy to keep the fire burning, turned around and faced him with a smile. “Yeah, I thought if I ever got a visitor again, it might be nice for them to be able to sit down once in a while.” Despite her downplaying it, Bill knew that she had gotten this one for him because he had been nagging her about it. She was not the kind of person who invited other people into her place that often, but rather visited them in their homes where she could leave again when she felt like she'd had enough company for the day. But the last time he'd been there, Bill had insisted on her taking the chair for their meals while he contented himself with the cot.

Finally, the fire crackled and bathed the room in warm light. With a sigh, Laura sat down on the chair next to the fireplace and reached out her cold hands towards the metal vessel. Placing the second chair next to hers, Bill sat down as well and stared into the flames that were partly covered by a lid that allowed the smoke to escape through a small hole in the tent roof. If it weren't for the occasional whiffs of cold air that made it inside, this could have been a cosy little room in a cabin somewhere in the woods, one of those where people would stay for the weekend to go hiking or fishing or to just enjoy some peace and quiet.

For now, though, he was more than happy with what he had here. He looked over to Laura and what he saw made his heart flutter happily: she had moved closer to him on her chair, sitting there with her eyes closed and a smile on her face, soaking up the warmth surrounding them, her hands resting in her lap. He'd never take it for granted that she would actually drop her guard and be simply Laura without any titles or jobs or duties she'd had since they had met. Only Laura, the woman he loved and had come here to spend some precious time with. Aching to feel her closer to himself, he reached out for her hands and tucked them in both of his, rubbing them gently to help restore the warmth they had lost during the day. With a hum, Laura leaned closer and rested her head on his shoulder. Neither of them felt the need to speak since they seemed to communicate non-verbally what they both needed and wanted: to feel the other close to themselves and to savour those moments of unadulterated peace.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Caprica. Laura finishes work at school on a Friday afternoon and muses on times gone by and on what could lie ahead of her. Not only regarding her own future, but also this thing between her and Bill for which she cannot find a name for yet.
> 
> (Title from C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves")

* * *

Disclaimer: BSG (2003) and all the characters are property of Ron D. Moore. I merely borrowed his playthings to play a bit in his sandbox.

Enjoy! 

Jules xx

* * *

 

When her tired mind registered a delicious smell permeating her tent, she was confused for a second. She had just come back from school mere moments ago and sat down by the fireplace, hadn't she? When she slowly opened her eyes, she was surprised to find herself lying in her cot, wrapped in a warm blanket, and she heard the fire crackling. Then she suddenly remembered. Bill.

Bill had unexpectedly appeared after school and they had gone back to her tent together. In order to make sure he was not just a dream, she quickly sat up and scanned her surroundings. As soon as she detected the source of the smell, a smile lit up her face.

Standing with his back to her, Bill was busy stirring the contents of a large pot that was placed on top of the fireplace. When he heard the rustling of her blanket, he turned around and looked at her, sitting on her cot with ruffled hair. “Dinner's almost ready,“ he informed her in a soft tone and with an expression on his face she had equally both craved and feared. Laura rubbed her eyes and, with a yawn, got up from the cot to put on her boots that were standing in front of it while Bill continued stirring. She gathered one of her long wool cardigans and wrapped it around her body that had started shivering the moment she had gotten up, protesting against the sudden loss of the additional warmth of the blanket.

Laura was leaning on the shelf next to the cot and thought about the situation for a second: it seemed so strange to have Bill here with her, yet so familiar. And so right. She was not used to having people tend to her needs on a personal level, at least not any more, not to mention people making the effort to cook for her in her own place. But with Bill, even if they hadn't seen each other for quite some time now, it all seemed like it was meant to be. And it definitely seemed like something had shifted between them since they had last seen each other. A shiver ran down her spine, and this time not from feeling cold. She had no idea how she was supposed to behave here and what was wrong and what was right. All she knew, and that was what was frightening her, was that she loved having him being all homey in her tent and that she didn't want him to leave again.

After a minute or so, she took a deep breath, stretched her neck and decided to join him by the fireplace. When she was standing right behind him, she peaked over his shoulder. “It smells amazing! What is it?” she asked with her mouth close to his ear. Bill, aware of her being so close to him, placed the wooden spoon on the plate on the table next to the fireplace and turned around slowly. Running his hands up and down her arms because he could see that she was trembling, he explained: “I thought you could do with some hot stew today. It's all root vegetables and some meat I got from the market while you were sleeping.” Laura's stomach started fluttering now that they were standing so close and looking at each other, the tender expression on his face betraying the matter-of-fact tone he was using. “How long have I been asleep then when you managed to prepare all that?” she asked with a quiet voice, also unable to hide the emotions that were running through her. Bill chuckled. “Well, let's say, long enough for me to go for a short walk, check in with Saul and Ellen and get your weekend grocery shopping done.”

Laura didn't really know what to say when she realised more and more that Bill was planning on spending as much time as possible with her while he was on the planet this time, and to take care of her – if she would let him. The latter was probably also why he had left and not joined her on the cot, he didn't want to push her into any direction. But still, he had obviously carried her there and covered her with her blanket and, judging from the unusual warmth in the tent, also added another couple of logs to the fire before he had left. If it were any other man, she would have told him straight to his face that she was perfectly capable of taking matters into her own hands, that she didn't need anyone to patronise her or take care of her and that she was in no way inclined to have someone live with her. But here she was, standing opposite Bill Adama who was now cupping her cheek and stroking it with his thumb, clearly showing her what she meant to him and allowing her to get some rest for once, rest from fighting to stay in control of her own life all the time.

A small sob suddenly escaped her mouth and, terrified, she realised that something wet was running down her cheeks. Before she could do anything, however, Bill had pulled her closer to him and wrapped her in a gentle but firm embrace and was stroking her hair and her back with his hands. “Laura, it's alright if you feel overwhelmed. It's not like you're having the time of your life on this rock.” Laura was still internally fighting against this intimate moment, not willing to be so vulnerable when she had managed to pull herself together since she had come down here.

But when Bill started planting soft kisses on the top of her head, not letting go of her, muttering soothing words against her hair, her resolve began to melt and she lost herself in his embrace. Lost herself in a moment that could go on forever. Lost herself in something she had sworn she would never do again. And lost herself in the idea that this, her being with Bill, could be something real. She didn't try to hold back her tears and buried her face in his chest, inhaling his scent and seeking the warmth of his body that seemed like a safe place to escape from all that was going on in her life on this planet.

Droughts, cold showers, snow, ice, and storms destroying their harvests. A political situation that included Gaius Baltar being a less-than-average president (to say the least), people revolting against mad taxes he wanted to introduce now that they were theoretically able to go back to “business as usual” - which in fact, they weren't at all – and, of course, him trying to interfere with her school policies, probably simply to keep her under his control. Not to mention the social reclusion that she was feeling day by day, even with a bunch of people by her side. All of it was washing over her at this moment, her body was shaking and she was clinging to his chest while Bill was holding her close to him, not letting her go.

After a while, she felt herself calming down and her body, exhausted from the emotional turmoil, became limp in his embrace. Slowly, Laura lifted her head to wipe her eyes and her face with the back of her hand and then looked up into Bill's face, anxious to see his reaction to what had just happened. All she found was two blue eyes boring into hers with an expression that communicated so much more than he could tell her with words. He gently tucked a strand of hair that had fallen into her face behind her ear and placed another soft kiss on her forehead. “You okay?” he mumbled against her skin. Laura hummed and carefully extricated herself from their embrace. Standing in front of Bill who was eyeing her, she gently put a hand on his chest again and smiled at him, her eyes still watery. “How about we try that stew of yours now?” she asked him with quavering voice, wanting to sound more cheerful and confident than she was feeling at that moment. Sensing that Laura did not want to talk about the sudden outburst of emotions with him, at least not for now, he covered her hand with his and smirked at her. “Well, then take a seat by the fire and your dinner will be served shortly, madam.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Caprica. Laura finishes work at school on a Friday afternoon and muses on times gone by and on what could lie ahead of her. Not only regarding her own future, but also this thing between her and Bill for which she cannot find a name for yet.
> 
> (Title from C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves")

* * *

Disclaimer: BSG (2003) and all the characters are property of Ron D. Moore. I merely borrowed his playthings to play a bit in his sandbox.

Enjoy!

Jules xx

* * *

Half an hour and two bowls of stew later – if it had been up to Bill, Laura would have eaten a third one, she hadn't missed the looks he had given her when he had arrived earlier that day, noticing how thin she looked even though she was wearing several layers of wool clothes – they both settled on the thick rug in front of the fireplace that Laura had gotten from one of her students' parents. Glancing at Bill who was staring into the partly hidden flames with a relaxed smile on his face, Laura scooted over to where he was sitting after a few minutes. He didn't turn his face to look at her, but simply tucked her into his side and pulled her even closer to his body. When Laura hummed contentedly and leaned her head against his chest, her arm draped across his belly, she could feel Bill's smile grow wider against her head.

For a while, neither of them felt the need to speak, holding onto each other, yet Laura was still confused by the level of intimacy she was willingly allowing here and the urge to voice a few questions that were tumbling around in her head grew stronger. “Okay Bill, what exactly is it that we're doing here?” she finally asked with as firm a voice as she could manage. The man to her right stopped stroking her hair, lifted her chin with a finger and carefully turned her head in order to look into her eyes. “What do you mean?” he asked back with a slightly confused look on his face, raising an eyebrow. Laura moaned quietly and tried to find the right words. “Well, you know, you coming down here for something other than military matters, us spending time together in my tent, you making dinner for me and now this?”

She took a deep breath and looked down at their hands, both resting on her leg, fingers laced. “This being us wrapped in each others' arms by the fire? Seems more than a courtesy visit between the former president and the military leader to me.” Laura was surprised when she heard Bill's deep, rich chuckle and saw the wrinkles around his eyes deepen with his smile. “Yeah? I wouldn't have noticed,” he replied, grinning at her. Laura huffed and impatiently extracted herself from his embrace. “Bill, I'm being serious here,” she grumbled at him with a glare that would have brought her students this morning to duck away from her and never question anything she said ever again. Well, at least for the next hour or two.

Bill, however, gently took her arm again and softly stroked the rough wool with his thumb. After a moment, he inhaled slowly and then started speaking again in a more sincere voice. “Laura. I can only speak for myself, but I've come here for those two days off because I wanted to spend time with you. Because I missed you.” He stopped talking and waited for her to lift her eyes until their gazes met again. The look on her face was a mixture of confusion and tenderness, tinged with a hint of sadness. Laura closed her eyes for a moment and murmured, “I know,” before she carefully covered his hand on her arm with hers and ran her fingers over the soft skin. “I know. But should we be doing this? I mean, is this a smart thing to do in our positions?” she asked with a rueful smile on her face. The expression on Bill's face turned into an equally rueful smile and he moved both his hands up to cup Laura's face. “Sorry to disappoint, but our positions are not what they were before. So, maybe we should start living our own lives again for once? Remember what you said that night?”

Of course she did. She remembered talking about how people should live the lives they wanted to live before it was over and embrace their new life and the new world they had just stepped into. Life truly was a bitch and death was inevitable, whether it was tomorrow or in a couple of years. Everything given to them was only borrowed time and too precious to go to waste. She remembered those thoughts, even though she also remembered being slightly stoned when she had uttered them, lying on top of a sandbag, her body tightly curled around Bill's. They had spent the night like that, smoking, talking and philosophising about life, all the time remaining in each others' arms. When she thought back to those blissful hours of being as close to another human being as she hadn't been in too long, she couldn't remember why nothing further had happened. She had been more than only physically attracted to Bill back then and those herbs they had smoked that night certainly wouldn't have lessened that attraction. Maybe it was because the two of them had simply felt at ease and in tune with the universe, regardless of all the mayhem they both knew would soon start around them now that Baltar was president and they had to manage surviving on a new planet with less promising conditions than she had thought before. Still, Bill had managed to chase all those dark thoughts out of her head (well, maybe the stuff they had smoked had played its part in that as well), so she had felt relaxed, level-headed and happy with what she had – and was sure he had felt the same.

“Laura?” His voice and one of his fingers softly stroking her cheek brought her back from thoughts of a time that almost felt like a past life. She looked up into his eyes again and detected a flicker of worry there. Leaning into his touch, she whispered, “Of course I remember. How could I forget that night?” She closed her eyes again and enjoyed the feeling of his warm skin on her face, of his body close to hers, of his mere presence soothing her. And yet.

Without a warning, she moved away from his touch and jumped to her feet, leaving behind a very startled Bill Adama staring at her incredulously. Tearing her hair, she was now pacing back and forth in the small room of her tent. “Laura?” Not stopping her movements, she started speaking agitatedly. “But what if this doesn't work out? What if we have to go back to being on opposing sides of a decision-making process once Baltar's government fails and I am... and I am president again? What then, Bill? How is this supposed to work then?”

Suddenly, she felt his strong hands gripping her upper arms and when she pushed her hair out of her eyes with a quick movement of her hand, she was facing an angry-looking Bill. “What if the Cylons come back? What if disease strikes? Volcanoes? Earthquakes? Laura, those were your words!” She was shocked by how livid he appeared and how his mouth had started twitching. “You want a frakking guarantee? There is none, Laura.” And then she felt his lips crushing down on hers and his arms engulfing her body in a suffocating embrace.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Caprica. Laura finishes work at school on a Friday afternoon and muses on times gone by and on what could lie ahead of her. Not only regarding her own future, but also this thing between her and Bill for which she cannot find a name for yet.
> 
> (Title from C.S. Lewis, "The Four Loves")

* * *

Disclaimer: BSG (2003) and all the characters are property of Ron D. Moore. I merely borrowed his playthings to play in his sandbox.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
Jules xx

* * *

Her inhibitions towards their physical and emotional closeness were melting away as unstoppably as her own desire was flaring up inside. She gave in to his assault on her lips, to his hands roaming freely over her breasts, and to the hard length that was pressing into her abdomen.

Thoughts? What were thoughts? Why bother with anything when she, for all she knew, might only have one more night on the frakking planet, one night that for once would make her forget everything and that would make her feel something other than the cold creeping up her spine and her anxiety for their future strangling her? No, this was her life and as Laura, she had every damn right to be selfish, now that people had decided they didn't want her to be the one guiding them through whatever lay ahead.

With a roughness that surprised them both, she grabbed his sweater and pulled it over his head, only to admire the view of his broad chest for a few seconds before she started her own attack on him. Whatever frustration had been building up during those last few months, all of it was pouring out of her in this moment and firmly, she pressed her hand against the bulk in his pants. His surprised moan encouraged her only further, and she yanked open the black leather belt so aggressively that Bill swayed lightly and staggered towards her. Capturing his mouth in hers, she bit down on his lip, pulling him closer to her with her hands on the firm cheeks of his ass. With a groan, he pushed his tongue into her mouth once she had stopped her assault, eliciting a low growl from her.

Their tongues continued their belligerent dance for a few more moments before the need to breathe became paramount and they broke their kiss. They stared into each others' darkened eyes intensely for a long moment, and no words, no verbal communication was needed to convey to the other that they would not be able, would not want to stop there. Panting, they stumbled towards each other again and roughly got rid of the rest of each others' garments.

When Bill looked around them for a place to settle, Laura impatiently dragged him towards the table and manoeuvred herself on its top, still firmly clasping his hands. She propped herself up on her elbows and instead of the oh-so-romantic batting of eyelashes that would have been appropriate at another time and place, she shot Bill a dirty look that immediately had him half on top of her. With a grunt, he thrust his throbbing erection inside her and hissed when Laura's fingernails scraped his back in an effort to pull him even closer and to feel him deeper inside her.

Their movements remained frantic, and so did the moans and screams they elicited from each other while they desperately tried to mark the other's body with scratches and bites. Sucking on the tender skin of their necks until a dark patch appeared, they created visible witnesses that they were actually living their lives together at this moment. For once, they didn't care about how what they were doing would appear to those around them, to those from whom they were forced to keep a certain distance. Which included the two of them as well. Whatever obstacle had been between them, had crumbled and dissolved into tiny fragments that were too unimportant to be mindful of any longer, and that shattered at the latest when they both came mere seconds apart with low groans, holding tight onto their slick bodies for assurance that they were both really there.

 

 

 


End file.
